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January 8, 2009
McDonald's confirms the obvious
Sometimes an article just makes you shake your head:
THE woman given the job of promoting McDonald's has revealed the secret of the fast-food chain's success – salt and fat....
"But fat and salt makes food taste good. There is no point taking all the fat and salt out of your food because people won't like it and they will eat with someone else. We have to make small steps to help people improve their diet."
What an epiphany! And yes, salt and fat are absolutely essential for good health, and yes, a double Quarter Pounder has way more of both than you need in the course of a day. Unless you're Michael Phelps.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:37 PM | Comments (0)
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December 11, 2008
Coffee Wars- I'm Lovin' it!
(Disclosure: I've been a Starbucks shareholder over the years, and if I was masochistic enough to look at a brokerage statement these days I could tell you for sure if I'm in the stock now.)
I haven't been a Starbucks fan for quite a while now for one main reason- their coffee has gone way downhill since their meteoric expansion. They've been a victim of their own success- it's much, much harder to source a million pounds of quality coffee beens than it is to procure 100,000 pounds. I get that, really.
You either buy into the whole half-caff mocha java tall/grande/venti one Equal one Splenda no foam whip Frappicino thing or you don't, but my main beef is the quality of the coffee and the mass produced pastries that are so heinously overpriced it offends me when I have to spend money there while at an airport.
Having said all that, I was fascinated by an article I came across today that really made me aware of the nasty coffee war going on against Starbucks:
McDonald's has erected a billboard in sight of Starbucks headquarters declaring, "four bucks is dumb."If Dunkin' Donuts' taste test commercials were the schoolyard equivalent of blowing spitballs at the coffee giant from afar, then the latest from McDonald's is like pulling a wedgie. Starbucks employees driving northbound can see the billboard on their way into the city.
Another billboard slogan jabs, "large is the new grande." The two phrases are displayed on 140 billboards in Western Washington, some of them near Starbucks cafes.
Ouch.
Have a favorite coffee? I pick up a few coffees I like at Sprouts, but I've enjoyed a lot of Peet's coffee over the years.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:36 PM | Comments (3)
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December 8, 2008
The "Pigatorium" Lives!
When all else fails to get customers in the door, there's always gluttony:
While such deals are most pronounced and heavily marketed in the troubled casual-dining sector, even quick-service and family-dining operators now are touting “endless,” “bottomless” and “never-ending” food portions.Practitioners insist that the all-you-want marketing messages are not signs of desperation and that unlimited servings of key comestibles can be cost-effective, despite giveaway gaffes that previously hurt prominent restaurant brands. Regardless, industry analysts say such appeals to gluttony may be necessary in the current economic climate.
It's a vicious cycle- blow out portions to bring 'em in, cut corners to get get your food cost percentage down, people feel ripped off (but really full) and don't come back. Not a healthy sign for the industry.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:50 PM | Comments (1)
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November 3, 2008
Good Grief- announcing the 100 calorie Twinkie
What's the point?:
They didn't want to just shrink the Twinkie, known for its elongated shape, Leavitt said, so they created three, miniature round versions. Leavitt said people enjoy having multiple bites rather than just the one product."It's not some impostor like some portion control products would be," Leavitt said. "From that standpoint it eats like a Twinkie, it smells like a Twinkie, it tastes like a Twinkie."
He didn't disclose how they ensured that the new version kept the taste of the old one.
I would've posted a picture, but I don't have a photo attachment for my microscope... Actually, I was surprised to read that a regular Twinkie only has 150 calories.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 12:46 PM | Comments (0)
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October 21, 2008
What? No more Zima?? AAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!
How can they kill a classic?
The joint venture between SABMiller's U.S. unit and Molson Coors Brewing Co. told distributors in a letter Monday that production of the malt liquor beverage was discontinued as of Oct. 10. Chief Marketing Officer Andy England says the decision was due to weakness in the "malternative" segment and declining consumer interest.
Classic what, I have no freaking idea. Did anyone ever even try one?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 12:22 PM | Comments (2)
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October 7, 2008
The Pragmatic Chef™ comments on this evening's Presidential Debate
Hey! Chocobake Fudgy Chocolate Brownies!!!!!!
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:54 PM | Comments (0)
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September 24, 2008
What udder nonsense...
Good grief:
People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter to Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, cofounders of Ben & Jerry's Homemade Inc., urging them to replace cow's milk they use in their ice cream products with human breast milk, according to a statement recently released by a PETA spokeswoman. "PETA's request comes in the wake of news reports that a Swiss restaurant owner will begin purchasing breast milk from nursing mothers and substituting breast milk for 75 percent of the cow's milk in the food he serves," the statement says.
No more Cherry Garcia for me if that happens! What would they call their first flavor- Mother's Breast?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 6:58 PM | Comments (0)
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July 30, 2008
When Competitors Attack
Update 8/1: A traffic spike from a pro Fresh & Easy blog tells me I'm not the only one bothered by this.
I rarely rant here, but imagine my incredulity when I got home last night to find these on our door knob.
There's a new Fresh & Easy market opening in our neighborhood. I've only been in an existing store two or three times to date, and I've always found the store spotless and well stocked. Not crazy about a few things- prepackaged vegetables and fruit, the lack of a meat counter, etc., but their business model is based on getting the consumer in and out quickly, with some pretty good stuff. Self checkout only, with a human standing by ready to help, but it's a very 'lean and mean' organization. I respect that.
It's also a non union shop, which is why the grocer's union is so relentless in trying to take them out before they really get rolling here in Phoenix. Did I mention that these door hangers were produced by the grocer's union? They were not produced by Albertson's and Kroger's, whose employees earnestly inform us about a few health infractions going back to 2004 on Tesco's UK operations. They tell us to wait to shop there until there's a proven track record of safe operation in the US, and they referred me to a website where I can sign an anti-Tesco petition. For what? I'm not buying it, sorry, and I'm a union member from way back.
Fight fair, guys. I've been in your local stores here, and found them frequently to be substandard, to say the least. I've bought your meat products, and returned them because they were inedible. I've marveled at the overpriced, aging produce you sell with a straight face. I'm not a snob. I find better quality goods, usually at lower prices, in places like Sprouts, or Costco, or the ethnic stores in our area, so it's a rare day when I visit a supermarket anymore.
Fight fair, guys. You're better than that. Aren't you?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:38 AM
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July 17, 2008
So- now what are we supposed to eat?
Back to a good 'ol greasy double cheeseburger, I guess. Now researchers say there's possible danger in tilapia. Sheesh:
The researchers found that farm-raised tilapia — the fifth most popular fish consumed in the United States -- could be potentially dangerous to people dealing with heart disease, arthritis and asthma.That's because farm-raised tilapia has very low levels of beneficial omega-3 fatty acids. "Perhaps worse, it contains very high levels of omega-6 fatty acids," the researchers said.
The combination "could be a potentially dangerous food source for some patients with heart disease, arthritis, asthma and other allergic and auto-immune diseases that are particularly vulnerable to an 'exaggerated inflammatory response.' "
Sounds like they're being awfully selective. I guess we're supposed to just lock ourselves in a dark closet with a lifetime supply of wheat grass.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 11:00 AM | Comments (0)
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April 26, 2006
Who needs Culinary School?...
... when you can have one of these babies?:
This project aims to introduce computing into traditional culinary utensils. It seeks to provide information, in an integrated manner, about any food the spoon is in contact with, and to offer suggestions to improve the food. The spoon is equipped with sensors that measure temperature, acidity, salinity, and viscosity, and is connected to a computer via a cable. The sensors evaluate the different properties of the food, and send them to the computer for further processing. Apart from consolidating measurements that are normally done by an array of equipments into a single spoon, the information obtained can be used to advise the users what their next step should be; for example, it tells the user if there is not enough salt in the brine prepared to make pickles.
The intelligent spoon was invented by Connie Cheng and Leonardo Bonanni, a couple of MIT students. I'm not sure why they're doing this, except because they can, but I guess it could have a practical application.
Can't it?
Thanks to Chuck for the tip.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 2:08 PM
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January 12, 2006
This suit sounds fishy...
A shrimp a hibachi chef tossed at a man eating at a Japanese steakhouse ultimately led to the diner's death, his family claims in a $10 million wrongful death lawsuit against the restaurant chain Benihana.Jerry Colaitis wrenched his neck when he ducked to avoid the shrimp in the chain's Munsey Park restaurant, attorney Andre Ferenzo said in opening statements Wednesday.
Months after the January 2001 incident, the 43-year-old Long Island man died from complications caused by neck surgery he required afterward, the lawyer said.
Benihana lawyer Charles Connick said it was unlikely a chef who works for tips would toss food at customers after being asked not to, as Ferenzo claimed. Even if that happened, Connick added, the cause of Colaitis' death was an infection or neck injury unrelated to the shrimp.
Every time I think about opening a restaurant, I'm going to read this.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 2:50 PM | Comments (4)
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January 5, 2006
Chop- Fooey!
I don't know about these, especially for over $20. With the amount of wasabi I add to my soy sauce, they'd clog up like my arteries after one of those 72 ounce steaks you can get in Amarillo.
How about you? Think I should sell 'em at Desert Island Foods™.com?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 10:19 AM
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December 8, 2005
Food Weblog Awards
Meg has up a post announcing the 2005 Food Weblog Awards. After a few comments over there, Meg banned me, so I've had to slap together my own post...
Lots of good food blogs out there, go nominate your favorites! I'd appreciate it if you would nominate me for the categories I actually have a chance of winning, such as:
“Best Use of Kelp Shampoo and Bacon Bits in an Entrée”“Worst Kitchen Cut in a Drunken Frenzy”
"Most Inept Bungling of the most Expensive Ingredients"
"First to use King Crab, Peanut Butter, WD-40 and Snails in a Fritatta Without Killing Anybody"
Any categories I missed?
Thanks for your support! Nominations end Friday, so get 'em in!
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 12:30 PM
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December 6, 2005
Bordeaux Growers Still Whining...
(Photo: AFP)
The wine producers of the great Bordeaux region of France have really gotten their butts kicked over the last few years. Between the rising euro, stiff competition from up and coming vintners such as Australia, over pricing during the dot.com era, and the fact that even the French don't drink as much wine as they used to, a lot of growers that bought over-valued property in the area in recent years are facing plummeting grape prices.
So what's their plan? A good ol' French strike to protest their bad fortune. That ought to help...
Suck it up, mon amis! I haven't bought Bordeaux in any quantity since the great vintage of 2000, when I was smart enough to buy futures, but in recent years I've been buying mostly Aussie and American. And giving my liver a bit of a rest.
I know they'll pull it together. I'm a sucker for a big, bad Bordeaux, and market forces will ultimately prevail. Survival of the fittest and all that.
The link expired to the article I was going to link originally about the threatened strike, but this has more information.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:40 AM | Comments (0)
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October 13, 2005
Totally "Rover" the top
(Photo: AFP)
I guess this ties in with my eating a Milk-Bone story yesterday, but a Paris shop has gone completely over the top:
Does our little four-legged friend Fido have a hankering for a foie gras cookie? Or maybe a biscuit in the shape of a heart, a flower or the more classic bone, confected with tropical fruit or carob?These and other canine delicacies -- without sugar or salt, of course -- are on the menu in France's first and only patisserie for pooches, "Mon Bon Chien" ("My Good Dog").
It was founded by an ex-American, go figure. Is this a viable business plan, or is she barking up the wrong tree?... Ouch, sorry.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 10:24 AM | Comments (5)
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October 6, 2005
I'm going back to high school
(Photo: Cafeteria food, as I remember it)
Wow, could this be true? High school students now spend $65 to $80 a week on lunch? I read this at NRN, and it floored me. Apparently kids have a taste for restaurant chain food, and are thumbing their noses at traditional cafeteria crap, so schools are creating upmarket food concepts.
Smoothie bars? Whole-wheat pancakes and waffles?? Rice Bowls with jasmine rice, tandoori chicken and mango chutney??? Man, I remember "Pizza Fridays" being a treat.
Okay, you've all got some cafeteria horror stories. Let's hear 'em!
Registration required, so I'll quote a bit of it below the fold.
Continue reading "I'm going back to high school"
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:38 AM
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August 29, 2005
Coffee study
(Photo: http://www.kokoespresso.com/)
Researchers are now finding that coffee has many of the same health benefits found in tea and vegetables, and hints that Americans may actually get more anti oxidants from coffee than any other food source. The whole AP article has a lot of good stuff, and is worth reading with coffee in hand:
The findings by Joe A. Vinson, a chemistry professor at the University of Scranton, in Pennsylvania, give a healthy boost to the warming beverage."The point is, people are getting the most antioxidants from beverages, as opposed to what you might think," Vinson said in a telephone interview.
...
They concluded that the average adult consumes 1,299 milligrams of antioxidants daily from coffee. The closest competitor was tea at 294 milligrams. Rounding out the top five sources were bananas, 76 milligrams; dry beans, 72 milligrams; and corn, 48 milligrams. According to the Agriculture Department, the typical adult American drinks 1.64 cups of coffee daily.
Okay, I drink a few cups of joe in the morning, so I'm happy to hear it, but I really hate studies. Wasn't this stuff supposed to be bad for you?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 9:20 AM | Comments (0)
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August 9, 2005
I hope he drinks decaf
A Nebraska man has made it his quest to visit every corporate-owned Starbucks in the world, visiting 29 locations in one day.
Rafael Antonio Lozano, now known as Winter, has caught the attention of an aspiring filmmaker named Bill Tangeman, who is filming a documentary of the saga that he hopes to screen at Sundance this year.
Winter has now visited 4,988 of the 5,715 comany stores and has been at it since 1997. He's set up a web site to track his progress. Which I would think would be tough, being that a new Starbucks unit probably opens every 9 seconds, it seems.
Is he nuts? Is he a genius? Is he just wired on caffeine?
Fair Disclosure- the pragmatic chef™ is a Starbucks shareholder but doesn't drink the stuff.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:08 AM | Comments (6)
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August 5, 2005
Lemonade's Last Stand
When life deals you lemons, set up a lemonade stand and then get squashed by "the man". Er, something like that:
A dispute between two boys hawking lemonade and a rival vendor who forced police to shut down their unlicensed stand was resolved Wednesday after the mayor orchestrated what he called "a corporate merger."Mayor Stanley Usovicz said sausage stand owner Kevin Kefalas agreed to allow Dominic Serino, 9, and Ryan Decker, 11, to operate as subcontractors under his vending license following an impromptu outdoor meeting initiated by Usovicz.
The agreement expires when school starts.
Gross receipts before the shutdown, $130.
No word if the boys from Salem, MA have soured on the idea of starting another business.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 9:11 AM | Comments (0)
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August 2, 2005
Hell's Kitchen
I didn't see much of this series, but I know it's over now. Did anybody watch any of this? How long would you last in a 140º kitchen with someone screaming at you at the top of his lungs?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 9:28 AM
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July 29, 2005
Tomato Toss Off
Plans for the first Tomato Toss have been mashed to a pulp. The city of Fairfield, CA, famous for its proximity to the San Andreas fault, had planned a 15 minute tomato fight as part of its Tomato Festival. The city signed Maytag as a corporate sponsor, who was going to film the event as part of an advertising campaign for a new washer.
Sounds good, right? Well, don't get juiced yet. Although they won't officially cite a reason, Maytag has puréed its support for the event. Stemming from merger talks with Whirlpool, they probably have no incentive to film anything now.
This is lame on so many levels. First of all, a tomato toss is nothing new, they've been doing a huge event in Buñol, Spain on August 28th for years now. And what's up with a 15 minute event? Weak.
Secondly, shame on Maytag for planting a seed of hope and then letting it go rotten. This will certainly leave a bad taste in the mouths of Fairfield citizens for a long time to come.
And finally, I have to put a pie in my face for shamelessly working so many tomato references into a straight news story.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:26 AM | Comments (0)
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July 18, 2005
He just didn't realize what was at "Steak"
What a moron. A manager in the meat department of a Budapest, Hungary grocery store is under arrest for suspected fraud. From the AP story:
The manager, who was in custody for suspected fraud, is accused of telling meat-counter staff without a supervisor's approval to put the tenderloin on sale for $4.40 per kilogram, instead of the usual price of $13.95.A few hours later, the manager's wife showed up at the store in the southern city of Kecskemet and tried to buy the beef at the discounted price. A cashier, aware the meat wasn't on sale, alerted security guards who called the police.
His wife bought 47 pounds of tenderloin, but they're still "not sure" if she was an accomplice.
Or what? Getting on the Atkins diet in a big way? Oh, brother.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:47 AM | Comments (0)
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July 13, 2005
McAngry lawyer files suit over shirt
(Photo:AFP)
Australian attorney Malcolm McBratney is McTicked off. Sponsor of a local rugby team called the "McBrats", McDonalds has challenged his right to use the term, alleging a conflict with a trademark they own on "McKids".
According to an AFP article:
"What it boils down to is that McDonald's seems to be trying to own not only the McDonald name but everything beginning with Mc," said McBratney, who is a specialist in intellectual property rights."There are a lot of people with Irish and Scottish heritage who'd dispute that, including me, and I'm prepared to take them on."
McDonald's maintains it is only protecting intellectual property, but McBratney is trying to throw out McDonald's trademark, claiming it was filed in 1987 and has not been used in recent years.
"I think it smacks of corporate arrogance that even though McDonald's is not using the McKids trademark in Australia, it still thinks it can block the registration of a separate trademark that has nothing to do with its business," McBratney said.
I think he has a case. I don't know anything about Aussie law, and very little about law in general, but I know from experience from registering some of my trade names like Desert Island Foods™ and Survival Spice™ that when you register a trademark or service mark here, you have to demonstrate current use or intent to use. A trademark is not granted in perpetuity, and once the conditions for filing are not met it is challengable in court.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:13 AM | Comments (1)
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July 11, 2005
Chirac eats Scots cuisine and his words
The president of France, Jaques Chirac has good-naturedly retracting his recent comments regarding British cuisine. From the Sunday Mail:
That was in stark contrast to remarks he made last week to Schroeder and Putin.Chirac said to them of British food at a separate summit: 'You can't trust people who cook as badly as that. After Finland, it's the country with the worst food.'
He was also picked up on microphone saying Britain's only contribution to European agriculture had been mad cow disease.
While attending the G8 summit in Gleneagles, Scotland, Chirac joined other world leaders in a feast of Scottish smoked salmon, lamb and caviar. After taking a lot of guff from the other leaders, he apparently sent for 41 year old executive chef Andrew Fairlie and offered his compliments on the meal, saying "Your food was fantistic."
I would have offered an amusé bouche of crow tartare, myself...
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 6:00 AM
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July 5, 2005
Bangers vs. Baguettes -or- Can't we all get along?
This is about as political as this blog gets, but the Telegraph has an interesting story about the thrashing Jacques Chirac gave British food:
Anglo-French tensions heightened last night after Jacques Chirac delivered a series of insults to Britain as London and Paris fought to secure the 2012 Olympic Games and faced fresh disagreement at the G8 summit.The president, chatting to the German and Russian leaders in a Russian cafe, said: "The only thing [the British] have ever given European farming is mad cow." Then, like generations of French people before him, he also poked fun at British cuisine.
"You can't trust people who cook as badly as that," he said. "After Finland, it's the country with the worst food."
"But what about hamburgers?" said Vladimir Putin, the Russian president, referring to America.
"Oh no, hamburgers are nothing in comparison," Mr Chirac said.
No official reply from Britain, though I understand a line of concrete trucks 4 miles long was seen headed for the Chunnel this morning...
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:46 AM
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July 1, 2005
Rubio's lobster suit boils over
(Photo of a Langostino Amarillo)
This is an interesting lawsuit.
A woman is suing Rubio's for deceptive advertising. In the suit filed in California June 28th, Lisa Marie Meier is seeking for a refund to all Rubio's customers who have purchased a lobster burrito or taco since their introduction.
From the Reuter's article:
Rubio's Chief Executive Sheri Miksa said Chilean langostino is classified as a lobster in seafood literature and by industry groups like the National Fisheries Institute."We had always believed that the product we were serving was lobster," Miksa said in an interview. Rubio's has changed the name of the product to the "Langostino Lobster Burrito".
Rubio's is using Chilean langostino, also known as a langostino amarillo, or yellow prawn. They have the claws of a lobster, although they're quite small. Technically, the prawn is a member of the lobster family and indeed, the Spanish word for prawn is langostino.
But to me, Rubio's was a bit disengenous in that when a customer sees the word 'lobster', they think of the large type. Langostinos aren't ubiquitous enough for most people to be aware of the similarities and differences.
Rubio's has now added Langostino to the name of the dish, which is I think is adequate as the taste, especially combined with other ingredients, is very similar to a regular full-sized lobster and certainly close enough for a frickin' taco.
Does she have a case? What do you think?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:24 AM | Comments (7)
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June 28, 2005
A Beef about Pork
The National Pork Board has announced its goal to increase the fat content in pork products by a few percent in the coming years, due to criticism of now widely-used practices of "enhancing" pork by basically brining the product to add moisture and customers trending towards more natural and organic food choices.
The Reuters article continues:
"Some people think we've gone too far in taking all the fat out," said David Meisinger, assistant vice president of educational services at the National Pork Board."When consumers buy pork, they don't want to see any fat in there. But when they eat it, they like the flavor and juiciness that a little bit of fat gives it."
Meisinger emphasized that this new pork will not be the high-fat, high-cholesterol variety that the industry abandoned two decades ago when it began likening itself to chicken with its well-known "Pork: The Other White Meat" ad campaign.
The goal is to keep pork healthy and lean while improving taste and texture by adding more marbling, Meisinger said, referring to the intramuscular fat that makes meat more juicy and tasty.
With more marbling, cuts may go from 99 percent lean to 97 or 98 percent lean, he said.
What a concept. Developing a product that actually tastes good instead of injecting crap with space-age polymers.
I like a fattier cut myself, like a shoulder or the pork butt pictured above, rubbed with Survival Spice™, and cooked low and slow in a smoker, in an oven or a combination of both. Always cook your meat cut fatty side up so as the fat renders during cooking it flows through the meat, adding flavor.
If you're cooking a chop or tenderloin, don't cook it until it's as hard as a brick, either. When in doubt, use a meat thermometer and pull it from the heat at around 145º. Carry-over cooking will take it to 150º. People are a bit overly concerned about trychnosis, which is just about unheard of these days and is killed at 138º anyway.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:27 AM
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June 26, 2005
"Turning over a new leaf" or "Batman don't eat burgers"
(Photo:AFP)
PETA is holding it's 'world's sexiest vegetarian' contest across the globe in an effort to promote a meat-free lifestyle, according to an AFP article:
"Celebrities are shunning meat faster than you can say tofu", PETA Asia-Pacific director Jason Baker said in a statement. "After all, what's sexier than someone who's both passionate and compassionate?"In the lead in the worldwide vote are American Idol winner Carrie Underwood, Canadian pop star Avril Lavigne and actress Gwyneth Paltrow.
Among men, British "Batman Begins" star Christian Bale is ahead of American actor Samuel L. Jackson and Britain's Coldplay leader singer Chris Martin.
Whatever turns you on, I guess...
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 11:09 AM
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June 23, 2005
A Whale of a Burger, apparently...
(Photo: Reuters)
Whale burgers? Oh, brother:
The 380 yen slice of fried minke whale in a bun went on sale on Thursday at Lucky Pierrot, a restaurant chain in the port city of Hakodate on Japan's northernmost island of Hokkaido."The taste and texture are somewhere between beef and fish," said Lucky Pierrot manager Miku Oh. "People in Hakodate have a long history of eating whale, so customers are looking forward to trying it."
Finally! Something that doesn't taste like chicken.
Update: Speed of Thought, a terrific Tucson blog, has more, including a bit on the political ramifications Chris mentioned.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 9:08 AM
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June 20, 2005
I will gladly pay you Tuesday (2041), for mu shu pork today.
Talk about running up a tab!
The officials of a Shaanxi province in China have run up such a large tab that the restaurant owner estimates it will take 36 years to pay off:
"The town government can only pay 5,000 yuan a year and they owe 180,000 yuan, so it will take 36 years to pay back -- that's a lifetime," Wei Zhongqin, the owner of the now bankrupt restaurant, was quoted as saying.
What's this guy serving- gold plated duck?
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:33 AM
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June 14, 2005
It had to happen sooner or later...
I saw this over at EGullet.
Luscious Gournets is launching a sexy cooking school show and is looking for applicants. Dress up in your finest (ergo, sleasiest) club wear and cook gourmet meals with the cameras rolling.
Luscious Gourmets Television Entertainment:Is an instructional reality gourmet television video / DVD series.
Blends "real-life TV", "how-to makeover TV", "lifestyles of the wealthy TV", "cooking and cinema TV" and "celebrity chef TV".
Selects as venues for the television production only the best designed and most well-equipped kitchens in elite private homes.
Apply here, or just get a frickin' life and don't bother. What exactly is club wear, anyway?
Sheesh.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:10 AM
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June 3, 2005
Yes, we have faux bananas...
From Reuter's:
Customs agents inspecting a shipment of plantains thought some of the green bananas seemed unusually hard and cut them open, finding more than 750 pounds (338 kg) of cocaine stuffed inside what turned out to be phony fruit.Smugglers molded the plantains out of glass fiber, filled them with cocaine and painted them to look like the real fruit, a large, green member of the banana family popular in the Caribbean and Latin America, the U.S. Customs and Border Patrol said on Thursday.
Well, they're ingenious. Busted, but ingenious...
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:57 AM
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May 31, 2005
Queso Chase-O
Photo: AP, from an AP article.
Okay, this is nuts. For hundreds of years now, citizens and ambulance drivers have gathered in the hills of Gloucestershire to watch a bunch of idiots roll down a steep 640 foot long hill chasing a round, 8 pound hunk of cheese towards the finish line.
This year's winner Chris Anderson, a 17 year old local lunatic said as he lay on a stretcher caressing his winnings like Paris Hilton fondles a dividend check:
"The pain was worth it," Anderson said. "This cheese is going straight in a cupboard when I get home. It's definitely not for eating."
Lots more information, video and more pictures here.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:28 AM
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May 27, 2005
A criminal waste of beer...
Well, I thought I was done posting for the day but here's a bonus, because I give 'til it hurts. From the AP and Yahoo news:
Eric Anduri was charged with misdemeanor battery for throwing a cup of beer at Jason Giambi on May 14th. Giambi, whose reception in Oakland has been frosty at best since becoming a Yankee, refused to press charges but the local DA has proceeded anyway.
``We have enough other witnesses to proceed with the case,'' Deputy District Attorney Paul Pinney said.A misdemeanor battery charge ``can be any kind of harmful or offensive touching. You can spit on somebody and that can be battery,'' Pinney added.
I think they're missing the larger issue here. This guy wasted a beer! What's up with that?
Hangin's too good for him, I say...
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 8:48 AM
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May 25, 2005
Of course it's life or death, I'm starving!
Via the AP:
Dorothy Densmore, an 86 year old woman from Charlotte, N.C. was arrested after she called 911 repeatedly last Sunday.
Why did she call? Because a pizza parlor refused to deliver a pizza to her, calling her "a crazy old coot."
She continued to call 911 even after being warned to stop, and after attacking the investigating officer was charged with 911 abuse and resisting a police officer.
She's either completely off her rocker or it's really good pizza...
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:45 AM
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May 24, 2005
Grapes get a new wrinkle...
(Photo: AFP)
French biologist Pascal Commenil has introduced a new wrinkle into the high end cosmetics industry- a face cream made from grapes.
In an AFP story, Commenil hopes discriminating consumers will want to 'save face' by paying $130 per jar of the fruity goo, which he justifies by the fact that it takes 10,000 pounds of grapes to make a pound of product.
Is he nuts? This may be sour grapes, but can't they make Champagne with those? Judging by the look on his face, I hope it works better than it tastes...
This may be a new record, I managed to work in at least one bad pun per paragraph. Please forgive me for not leaving them to 'wither on the vine'... Feel free to groan in the comments, I probably deserve it. Probably.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:00 AM
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May 19, 2005
For all you do, if you don't drink Bud you're through...
This is just wrong, via the Greeley Tribune and Yahoo News:
A Denver man, Ross Hopkins, has been fired from his job as a warehouse supervisor at American Eagle Distributing Co., a Bud distributor in the Denver area, for allegedly drinking Coors while off duty.
"They flat-out told me: 'We're putting food on your table so you could put it on theirs?"' he said Tuesday. "I thought I could drink it, no problem."In a court filing, American Eagle said Hopkins' termination "was necessary to avoid a conflict of interest with his responsibilities to American Eagle and/or the appearance of such a conflict of interest."
They 'canned' him despite a Colorado law that forbids firing employees for legal activity away from the workplace. He wasn't wearing a uniform and according to him, he had actually ordered a Bud and a waitress mistakenly brought him a Coors.
The son-in-law of the distributor's majority shareholder also was at the bar and offered twice to buy him a Budweiser but Hopkins turned it down both times.He was fired the following Monday.
Maybe I should institute a policy to fire Desert Island Foods™ employees for saying "Bam!" Sheesh.
The email address on American Eagle's website is here, if you're feeling chatty.
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 7:51 AM
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April 26, 2005
Man Pleads Guilty in French Fries Rage
Via Yahoo News:
A Burger King customer who berated the employees when a drive-thru clerk told him the restaurant was out of french fries has been convicted of multiple charges and sentenced to 45 days in jail.Authorities said Gregg Luttman made an obscene gesture at the clerk, cursed staffers and nearly hit an employee with his truck. When police tried to arrest him, Luttman allegedly scuffled with an officer and kicked out the back window of a cruiser.
Oh, brother. Read the whole thing here.
update- link fixed. Thanks, Silvia!
Posted by The Pragmatic Chef at 11:33 AM